Friday, April 27, 2012

Blog Share: My Partner is a Gamer

Partner, Boyfriend, Husband, Gamer, Video Gamer, blog, addicted gamer, addicted video gamer, gamer's wife, gamer's girl, gamer's girlfriend

I recently discovered (or rather, was discovered by) a woman named Vicki who also blogs about her gamer guy. Actually, she is much better at it than me because my blog covers a wider range of topics (like crafts and other random geeky things), whereas she has dedicated multi-post series on the how-tos and best practices of tolerating and eventually coming to understand your gamer's favorite addiction. My favorite categories include Game Face Tips (your attitude toward his gaming habit) and Things to Do While Your Partner is Gaming.

Anyway, I hope you'll check her blog out and give her some love and support. I guess the reason why I don't write as many focused entries on "dealing with" your gamer husband/boyfriend is because a) I don't consider K to be a hardcore addict and b) I've never had a problem with that particular hobby. I grew up watching my younger brother play video games, and now I enjoy watching K. In fact, I almost prefer it when K plays games versus when he wants to watch TV/movies with me because as a type A person who hates being idle, I want the freedom to get off the couch at any point and start doing something else, whereas a TV show or movie demands a large percentage of my attention for a continuous period of time.

But apparently women like me are not the norm. Of all the male gamers I know who have wives/girlfriends in their lives, about 66% of those women do not like it when their gamer, well, games. Some women are more supportive than others and will even buy video games as birthday gifts. Others flat-out despise the entire genre and will begin screaming at their significant others at the slightest "beep beep boop" they hear. One time I had a friend ask me if K plays Halo, and when I said, "No, why?", she replied, "Because I asked my husband to pick up some groceries last night while I was at work, and instead he spent the whole evening playing that stupid game. So, does K want a copy?" Um... your solution is to give away Halo? Won't he just turn to some other game next time? ^_^;;

I think K put it best when he asked, "Why are certain hobbies considered better than others? Like reading books versus watching TV versus playing a video game. All of them are just forms of entertainment that different types of people enjoy. And you cannot seriously tell me that reading Twilight is a 'higher form' of entertainment than playing Heavy Rain."

(I was totally going to put a picture of Twilight vs. Heavy Rain up here, but then I saw this awesome collage of the Heavy Rain main characters compared to the actors they were based on. So cool! Credit goes to SiMPLExDESiGN)

Are you part of the 33% who enjoys watching your significant other play video games, or the 66% who just tolerates/hates it? Why do you feel this way?


Unknown said...

I do not like watching my husband play video games, and sometimes I feel like it interferes with our time together. I am very thankful he gave up MMOs (his was Everquest) after we started having children. He realized that the commitment required to maintain your standing in the game was not compatible with the commitment required to being a good dad.

Last year he bought me an e-reader for our anniversary. I think it was so I could have something to do while he gamed! I do watch bad tv while he is vanquishing enemies and saving the world, and I catch up on knitting and reading.

This past weekend I dipped my toe into the world of Skyrim, so now we can ignore each other after bedtime!

Aside from electronic gaming my husband is a part of a local tabletop gamimg community and a memeber of the committee that puts on an annual convention. My friends don't understand what he does on Friday nights with his friends, but I feel like it is much more harmless than what many other husbands do when they go out on a Friday night with their friends!

A Gamer's Wife said...

Thankfully, K has never been into MMOs while we've been married, so I've never experienced gamer widow-dom to that level!

That's hilarious that he gave you an e-reader to "keep you entertained"; K did the same thing too, in a way, when he bought me my first Nintendo DS.

I try to describe K's HeroClix nights as "guys' poker nights" since yeah, most people just don't get it. But I totally agree with you; I'd rather have him at home playing games than out drinking at bars and flirting with women. ;)

Jessica said...

I'm probably part of the 33% - being able to sit and do some crochet of an evening while my husband gets his gaming fix really suits me well. I'm not so fond of his shooty type games - he's currently shooting away at other online gamers which is why I'm at the computer for a bit, but when he plays something like Portal 2 I think it's great :-)

geekturtle said...

I´m the gamer, he just likes to play FIFA since 07, 08, 09, 10, 11, 12 and I think he is on the waiting list for 13
and yes your husband is right the "gaming is for -male- kids" prejudice has been there for ages, I think it will be gone in one generation or two

A Gamer's Wife said...

@Jessica - Ooo, Portal 2 is a good one. K is currently playing through the co-op levels with his friend Shawn.

@GeekTurtle - It'll be interesting to see if your prediction is right. The large majority of my female friends downright disdain VGs, and even many of the male friends in our generation (like K's younger brother Steve) think video games are something of the past that they played as kids. Only time will tell. :)

Conni said...

I rather enjoy watching my husband play video games. I can crochet or read our do whatever else i want while he's doing that or sometimes I try to "help" (spot enemies or the like). Our favorite game series is the 3 Uncharted games. I have the computer and run the treasure finding while he's controlling the shooting (I'm TERRIBLE at that! ). I've also been through the MMO aspect. We both played World of Warcraft up until our first child was born, then I slowly tapered off. He still plays occasionally, but he mostly plays Diablo or Minecraft now along with some PS3 games. I agree with you all...I'd much rather have home at home than off with friends doing who knows what.

A Gamer's Wife said...

@Conni - My friend Sara does that for her husband Ben! She plays navigator and helps him find all the secret treasures in RPGs by combing through the strategy guide for him. What a great way to help play together with your SO even if it's a single player game. :)