Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Shelf Level Events, aka How to Flush $50 Down the Toilet

When playing the stunningly beautiful Lost Odyssey (produced by the creator of Final Fantasy), K suddenly met up with the infamous sandworm boss where not one, but two gigantic invertebrates are serially thrown at you with accompanying rainbow buggies that feed the boss more energy. This is when I learned the phrase "Shelf Level Event." It's an event or fight that is so hard and horrible and hateful that you wonder what the designers were drinking because now this game is totally shelved to collect dust bunnies until the end of time.

Stop wasting K's time and just die already! >_<

K must have invested ~2 hours into this fight with similar failures (and curse words) each time, until the game finally got put away with sorrowful regret. Then enters a new sheriff in town, my brother LDK. He and his girlfriend came to visit, and we spent a relaxing, non-assuming weekend of playing video games and watching movies. Being a huge lover of RPGs (but without the income to buy an XBox 360), LDK was eager to check out, of course, Lost Odyssey. Over the course of a couple of days, he quickly reached the shelf-level event and promptly beat the snot of the sandworm twins on his first try. O_O

What was his secret? A) K said my brother was extremely lucky because the rainbow insects weren't as aggressive that time and B) my brother uses the magic of the A button. The way LDK puts it, "You just wildly run around the map in crazy circles, while madly pushing A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A like your life depends on it." That way you'll find any hidden secrets, spells, and potions in every possible location. As LDK's girlfriend puts it, "Yeah, I couldn't watch him play games at first. It's like following a super-speed Roomba with a case of vertigo."

K has graciously combed through his old game shelves to provide a few choice examples of shelf-life events, so more on that next time!

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